“I am an old man now and have known a great many troubles,
but most of them never happened”.
Mark Twain
Leadership is a high-energy profession…full time…full service. The path to becoming a leader can be littered with troubles, both our own and those of our people, yet where do they come from? Why is bringing out the best in another so often problematic? Cue the wisdom of Mr. Twain – perhaps many troubles never happen…perhaps we inflict them upon ourselves.
The power of self-talk – the streaming monologue of our conscious mind, as well as the casual remarks we make, have power to be reckoned with. This narrative circuit within our brain is active over 50 percent of our waking lives, so let’s set an operational definition to understand it:
Self – a person’s distinct nature or identity…the ‘I’ as experienced by an individual.
Talk – to express in words.
Our self-talk is what we say about our life, our nature and identity. Now let’s illustrate the power with a real-life example:
“Robert” took a new job last fall. The position suited his competency and professional experience better than any job he’d ever had. The position paid much better than any he’d ever taken, but the pace of work was far more intense than anything he’d ever experienced. Over the first 30 days, Rob went to work telling himself, and any who would listen, that it was a real pressure cooker…that it was causing him massive headaches and other physiological symptoms. During his first 75 days he called in for personal time off totaling almost three weeks. Before his first 90 days were up Rob put in his notice.
Then, over the 15 working days that Rob put in after his notice, his self-talk shifted toward “I can do this…it’s only a few weeks…I’ll show ‘em they can’t beat me…then I’ll find a job that I really love…I can do this.” He became more relaxed, more effective, and more productive.
You can guess the moral – all else equal, we will experience life as we interpret it. Rob’s job hadn’t changed, Rob changed what he told himself about the job. And, how might we profit from his lesson? By harnessing the power of self-talk…by using positive affirmations! An affirmation is a statement of truth or existence – and its beauty lies in the fact that the statement doesn’t have to be true to have a positive impact on your life!
A colleague, Alan Zimmerman, describes the phenomenon best; “Your subconscious is a data processor, not a lie detector.” Your mind will believe what you tell it, and it will process your life based on what you repeatedly say! At its most basic, an affirmation is just a present tense statement of what you would like to see happen…a specific, personal statement of a desired future state. To harness the power of your own self-talk; say it often, say it loud, and say it as if it were already so!
