“When you want something, all the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it.”
~ P. Coelho
‘The universe conspires’ … ‘Lord willing’ … ‘If it’s meant to be’… there are countless ways to say the same thing. We’re speaking in each case of events that seem to happen to us – usually with significant impact, and often unexpected – that occur outside of our own centers of control. It’s the power of happenstance, or is it? Is it just a manifestation of our helplessness in a world beyond our comprehension? Is it evidence of a divine power? In the end it’s none of my business whether you believe that it’s coincidence in play or a higher power at work. Nor is it my point. What I would like to ask is how do you know when your life has changed or transformed … how are you keeping score?
Simply put, a lot of us are not keeping score in life. In launching a recent coaching engagement with a new client in the healthcare industry I began by asking lots of questions, including those related to his “now state”… about his fitness, diet, rest and recovery, and even about some spiritual, social and personal variables. I was actually surprised at how few of the questions he had a ready answer for, yet he’s a very driven, successful and thoughtful executive. He’s also about as busy a human being as you’ll ever find. The end-result of our first conversation told me that much of his directed consideration, drive and concern were limited to others. His family, friends, associates and staff. Leading in an organization that prides itself on metrics, measurement and accountability, the same discipline didn’t have to apply to him … and frankly, he lacked the energy for it.
This is true of a growing number of us as well. With so much tension, polarization and misery on display in just about every form of media, we in many cases become unaware and unmoved by early indicators of change in our own lives. Burned up or burned out on the job, we’re often just trying to keep on keeping on. So what do we do about it?
Let’s do something different – we can’t help but get better:
- Pick a list, any list – find a set of measures or questions that you can ask yourself regularly (at least every six months). Here are just a couple of ideas, https://bhmt.org/wp-content/uploads/2016/04/BHMT_CC_Life-Values_Inventory.pdf or http://www.sethchernoff.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/08/LifeInventoryWorksheetDownload.pdf. If you prefer it really simple, there are five questions advocated within the circles of ‘sobriety’ that actually apply to all of us; “Am I helping anyone?” / “How is my spiritual condition?” / “Am I taking care of my body?” / “Am I spending time on myself?” / “Am I holding on to any resentments?” (SoberNation.Com)
- Take some time reflect and discuss – find an accountability partner to compound the effect.
Net-net, we do almost nothing alone … make it a habit to notice what happens to you.
-Don Brown
don@donbrown.org
Don Brown dedicates his career to ‘helping people with people’ in leadership, sales and customer service. Bilingual and experienced at the executive and line-level alike, you see the results of his work across dozens of industries, including brewing, automotive, airline, banking and medical equipment.
Speaking, writing, coaching and selling to the best – Ford Motor Company, Anheuser-Busch, United Airlines, Harley-Davidson, Jaguar Cars, Hilton Hotels and many, many more – Don takes great pride in long-standing customer relationships (some running well over twenty years).
